Women in Afghanistan

When I was growing up I didn't think much about Afghanistan, nor did I as a college student or an adult. In fact, I don't think I thought about it at all or even knew where it was.

For a year or so prior to 9/11, I got occasional emails about how horrible things were for women in Afghanistan, and then shortly after 9/11 the pace quickened. This is an excerpt from an email message that was sent to me on October 8, 2001.

Madhu, the government of Afghanistan, is waging a war upon women. Since the Taliban took power in 1996, women have had to wear burqua and have been beaten and stoned in public for not having the proper attire, even if this means simply not having the mesh covering in front of their eyes. One woman was beaten to death by an angry mob of fundamentalists for accidentally exposing her arm(!) while she was driving. Another was stoned to death for trying to leave the country with a man that was not a relative.

I remember this email. It was filled with similar anecdotes, and I have to say it got my attention. It was not the first email I had received about the plight of women in Afghanistan, but it was the one that really got to me. The others I had passed off as email foolishness... nothing in today's world could really be that horrible! WRONG!

I have been to Dachau and I wondered how the people in this lovely little German village could have possibly not noticed the German death camp in the middle of town. Now we live in a Global Village and I find myself wondering -- are we just like those people in Dachau when it comes to pretending not to see what is happening in Afghanistan?

Back in 2003, I met Fahmina Vorgetts, an Afghan woman now living in the United States. She is a woman on a mission. She owns a rug shop in Annapolis and uses the money from the sale of Afghan rugs to to help the women of Afghanistan. But more than money, Fahima gives of herself -- her time, her energy, her many talents. Listening to Fahima and seeing her photos from Afghanistan left me with no doubt in my mind that the lives of Afghan women are horrible by 21st century standards -- even today when the Taliban are no longer in power.

Last week, Fahima spoke to a group of 74 attendees at a FacetsWoman event we called "Women of Afghanistan: An Insider's View." Fahima, who works as an advisor to Women for Afghan Women, has taken on the challenge of helping Afghan women build a better future for themselves. She is teaming up with women (and caring men) to build schools, provide women with computers, dig wells, build good will and more. We saw dozens of photos of Afghan women in make-shift classrooms, using improvised chalk boards, but learning to read and write. Their country is in ruins, but their grit and determination to succeed shows on their faces.

We also saw the faces of Afghan orphans. Their eyes have a vacant look that penetrates your soul. It is hard to explain the depth of emptiness found in their eyes. Their ranks continue to swell, and one must wonder what their odds are for a good future, even by current Afghan standards.

There were photos of the charred faces of scarred women in burn units. These women have poured cooking oil all over themselves, then set fire to the oil. This low-budget and horribly painful form of suicide is seen by some Afghan women as the only way to escape the pain of the lives. Some Afghan women also kill their children the same way for the same reasons. The women and children who don't die end up in under-staffed burn units as low priority patients, lost in a living hell.

Our FacetsWomen were clearly moved by what they saw. Cash donations that evening, made directly to Women for Afghan Women, exceeded $1200. Many women brought clothing and school supplies to the event, so that Fahima can take the items in one of her frequent shipments to Afghanistan.

For many of our FacetsWoman attendees, the catered Afghan dinner that evening was their first taste of Afghan food. The tasty chicken kabobs, rice, salad and baklava harkened to a happier time in the life of Afghanistan. For those who are interested, the caterer for the evening was Maiwand Kabob, 5467 Harpers Farm Road, Columbia, MD 21044, Ph: 410-992-7754 or www.maiwandkabob.us.fm.

We hope that someday the women of Afghanistan will enjoy the same opportunities we women now have in the US. Sure, many doors are still closed to us and our salaries don't match those of our male counterparts, but we are free in so many important ways. As one FacetsWoman put it, "Tonight, before I came here, I was focusing on spending money to re-d0 my bathroom and get a new bathtub. Now I realize how fortunate I am to have a bathtub at all."